Wednesday, September 5, 2012

The Omnivore Interviews Virgil Goode!

As part of The Omnivore's 3rd Party candidate interview series we wanted to catch up with former congressman  Virgil Goode of the Constitution Party. Goode is the man who many people think may beat Romney ... the way Nader beat Gore. He's running to Romney's right and pulling perhaps 4% in the crucial swing-state of Virginia. As most of that is presumably coming from Romney, it's all over for him if he runs. The good news for Republicans is that it's hard--very hard--to get on the ballot in Virginia: Remember, only a couple of RNC contenders managed it (Perry did not). So it's not too worrying.

Oh wait: he just did.

Goode gives us his basic platform in an easy to understand graphic:
Ending Citizenship for Anchor Babies? Hey--It's in the Constitution!
So we reached out to him ... and got no response ... in what is now part of a trend. We've never let that stop us. Let me introduce Virgil Goode!
It Does Look Like His Kind Of Chair, Don't It?
The Omnivore: Hello, Mr. Goode--thank you for taking time out of your busy schedule to speak with us! Let's get right to it: are you going to spoil Mitt Romney?

Virgil Goode: Thank you. I'm going to draw votes from both Republicans and Democrats. The man who I buy gas from told me this morning that he'd never vote for Romney--but he's voting for me.

The Omnivore: Does this man cross many demographics single-handedly and represent the mind-state of the thousands of potential VA Obama voters who will be attracted to your platform?

Virgil Goode: What?

The Omnivore: That's a personal anecdote. Polls show that with you in the mix Romney loses VA badly. Virginia is a crucial swing-state for him. Are you really going to run knowing you could cost the country four more years of Obama?

Virgil Goode: There's a saying in the armed forces: Go big or go home. I aim to go big.

The Omnivore: Don't you think that ending citizenship for children born in the US to illegals and a moratorium green cards might cost you the vote of everyone who came over here as an immigrant?

Virgil Goode: I'd like to think it'll get me the votes of millions of US citizens who are out of work right now.

The Omnivore: Doesn't sending children who may have been born here home after a life-time of growing up seem a bit heartless? Didn't Rick Perry call people who were too hard on immigration ... heartless?

Virgil Goode: It sounds like enforcing the law. I remember Rick Perry being unable to recall the third part of his platform.

The Omnivore: Okay. What would you do about Iran?

Virgil Goode: I'd need access to more intelligence that I currently have to know what to do. One thing I would not do is get involved in a war without the consent of Congress as the Constitution requires. I would NOT be led by the UN as we were in Libya.

The Omnivore: But suppose the intel says they are "making a sprint for a bomb"--in the final rapid stages of preparation of a nuclear weapon?

Virgil Goode: I suppose they had better 'sprint' pretty fast then.

The Omnivore: What would you do about jobs?

Virgil Goode: Remove regulations--but mostly cut down on illegals and immigrants who are taking US jobs. Most of the roofing done in areas of Virginia is done, I am told, by illegals. If you put a stop to that, you create jobs.

The Omnivore: How about ... I'm not even sure why I'm asking this ... stimulus?

Virgil Goode: We need to cut the deficit. We need to submit a budget that is balanced now--not in 10 years. We need to repeal ObamaCare and we need to cut across the board. Bold cuts, like the National Endowment for the Arts, Planned Parenthood, and Public Radio. They'll need to sell advertisements like everyone else. I wouldn't cut veteran's benefits though I would cut defense. It'll be painful--it has to be done.

The Omnivore: You know, though, that other than defense, none of that adds up to anything approximating a solution. What about ... Medicare? Social Security?

Virgil Goode: I voted to strengthen the social security lock-box and not allow funds to be taken out.

The Omnivore: So ... Cut planned parenthood, NEA, and NPR and we're good?

Virgil Goode: 'Goode.'

The Omnivore: Got it. What about the charge that you're going to make a naked play for Ron Paul voters? You have a few planks the like--auditing the Fed, return to a gold standard, and isolationism. Do you think you can capture his army?

Virgil Goode: They're free to vote however they like. Imagine if we had a gold standard right now--how our money would be protected from hyper-inflation!

The Omnivore: We ... uh ... are not seeing hyper-inflation.

Virgil Goode: Just wait.

The Omnivore: Yeah. Last question: Who would win in a fight--you or Paul Ryan?

Virgil Goode: ...

The Omnivore: Virgil? Mr. Goode?  :: touches chair :: ... I think he's gone ...

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